I bought my house two months ago, and still haven't met my next door neighbor. Here are my thoughts on him so far!
I hear that you're a state cop. Can I tell you how safe that makes me feel?! Of course, the folks I bought this house from BS'd me on a number of levels...so maybe you're not a cop after all. Perhaps you just work really weird hours. Could you wear a uniform so I can tell for sure?
Neighbor, it's nice to know that you have an active social life. I also realize that you have a small-ish driveway and we live on a main street. I'm sure that trying to fit a bunch of cars into your driveway for poker night (or whatever it is) is difficult. However, if you could NOT park in my driveway without asking - that would be super! Please know that I'm a fairly reasonable person, but I have this thing about being able to get into my driveway after working a 10-12 hour day.
I hear your dog all the time! I've seen him a few times too. He's big, he's black, he's cute. The "beware of dog" signs you have posted make me a little nervous though. Is he a working dog? Are the signs up because he's actually aggressive? I'd really like the low-down before my "kids" meet him through the fence between our yard.
One last question, neighbor. Is it really necessary to have the flood light in your yard on all night? I only ask because that light shines in directly though my bedroom window. You see, I'm an insomniac and that amount of light all the time disrupts the the little sleep I get.
Thanks, neighbor! I hope to meet you soon!