April 18, 2012

Dear (Fill in the Blank)

I've seen a few lovely bloggers do this lately (namely Andrea and Michelle), and knowing how much the love me (trust me, they do!) - I'm going to steal their idea.  :-)


Dear GMAC Mortgage
I don't appreciate having to spend two hours on the phone with you - to find out that you applied my March payment to pay my quarterly property taxes instead of taking it from my escrow account.  I mean, that's what an escrow account is for, right?!?!  Just checking!  And, NO, I will not make a "double payment" to fix YOUR mistake - MOVE IT FROM MY ESCROW ACCOUNT. Making me pay a "late payment" fee to apply money to the right place isn't cool either in case you're wondering.

Sincerely
A homeowner who understands accounting better than you...and may call the Better Business Bureau

_______________________________

Dear eBay
You kinda made my day when you helped me find Dansko clogs for $20.

Sincerely
My feet

______________________________

Dear USPS
If you don't start delivering my mail on a more consistent basis, I will be camping out EVERY. SINGLE. DAY to complain to the Postmaster.  Oh, and not delivering the mail is kinda like stealing it.

Sincerely
A woman who knows her stuff is missing

_____________________________

Dear Crazy Lady
No, your family DOES NOT own my house.  Please stop taking pictures of it, sitting in your car along my fence line and & staring and walking through my yard.  Next time, I will call the police.

Sincerely
Someone who is a little freaked out

___________________________

Dear DVR
Please keep up with all my crazy viewing habits.  It's April and we're in the home stretch.  I promise you'll get a break during the summer.

Sincerely
The fool paying Comcast a fortune

___________________________

Dear Sonic
Please open a restaurant near me.  I'm tired of people taunting me with their Route 44 sweet tea or other happy hour treats. I want one too! :-)

Sincerely
The girl who got addicted in TX, but lives in MA


12 comments:

  1. My mail has been horrible recently too! Missing bills and whatnot. My hubs has called a few times to complain, but nothing changes

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  2. Oh my gawd you're still having problems with USPS? I'm so sorry. I'd be PIIISSED! and just come on down to TX again and hang out with me, we'll have Sonic every day! Because I already do. ha!

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  3. Bahaha!!! This is awesome! Well... minus the crazy lady stalking your house.

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  4. Ooh...she's an angry elf. Not to rub it in...but I had a large sonic drink last night...2 for 1... tax day special. So close. I love me some Sonic. You wouldn't believe the closet full of Kids' Meal toys I have socked away...and I don't have any kids at home. :)

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  5. Hehehehe...okays dis was GOOD stuffs! I thinks I needs to do a postie likes dis.
    Howevers, we needs to discuss your stalker. Why is her takin' fotos of your house? Heres, it is actually legal to fotograpg as long as da fotographer ain't on da property. But dis lady seems to had some issues.

    Puddles

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  6. Sure you gave us a great post to have a good laugh!
    Happy Wednesday!
    Kisses and hugs
    Lorenza

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  7. Hahaha! I love your letters. Love them. We are 2 peas in a slightly dysfunctional pod.

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  8. I have a Sonic near me, but I stopped going because they got something in my order wrong EVERY SINGLE TIME. I really miss their Cherry Limeades...

    And what is the deal with your neighbor taking pictures of your house? That's creepy!

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  9. That crazy lady, wow...I would be calling the cops too.

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  10. Dude! The post office is pissing me off too! I mean they are taking FOREVER lately!!!

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